Hey, You Mothers!

Happy Mother's Day to all the mothers who've been reading this blog.

Well, I've had difficulty shopping for my Mom's Mother's Day present, so instead, I gave her the best thing I could think of instead--her flying papers back to Toledo. I haven't said much about the logistics of the last three weeks (or maybe I have--I don't remember), but we're now in day 20 of this little experience, and while Sherri and I have only been home for a day and half of the last three weeks, the same is true for my mother. . .worst vacation ever.

I know there are a bunch of people out there who have offered to help us with Emma during this time, and we know that you meant it and would have been great with her, but there's something about the comfort of Grandma that just can't quite be duplicated in a time that has been really stressful on the kid. And while a bunch of people could have taken care of her well, I'm not sure anyone could have managed her anxiety the way my mom has. She never made us feel as though she was being inconvenienced even though she was so hugely--her one opportunity to get home turned a three hour drive into a day's travel when she got a flat tire in Blufton, which appears to be a very cranky little town--and that's just one of the hassles she's endured. Thanking her seems ridiculous since this whole thing is something beyond thanks' ability to cover what her support has meant to us. So maybe it's validation that would be better expressed:

Hey Mom, you've done the 'mom' job as well as it could possibly be done in the last month--we're talking textbook "Giving Tree" stuff here, but without the creepy patina of guilt. I hope you never have to do anything like this again, but it's great to know we can count on you.

And I know it's not Father's Day yet, but I also need to thank my dad who, in the midst of his never ending recovery from back surgery as well as excruciating knee problems, found that perfect balance of being here when we needed him during the surgery while keeping the family business up and running without my mom in the store to carry the weight that she usually carries there as well. So he's been doing double duty in the worst of circumstances compounded by loneliness at home and my nastiness with him as I tried to handle the logistics of all of this.

Folks, never under-estimate the importance of having people in your life whom you can tell to take care of your shit but still leave you alone when you need it without being hurt, blow-up at and know that they'll cut you slack, even if you don't deserve it, and then take your for tapas when you need re-humanizing. If you don't have people like that in your life, I suggest you start looking for them post-haste.

This will go down as one of our oddest Mother's Days ever, of course. Normally, right now, we would be at Shapiro's Delicatessen in Indianapolis becoming joyously and uncomfortably cholesterol-poisoned and then on our way to our favorite vintage modern dealers, followed by club burgers and turtle sundaes in Shelbyville, IN at the remarkable Cow Palace whose ice cream rivals Graeter's, but I believe if you asked Sherri, she'd say it's better.

Oddly enough, in early April, Sherri said that she wanted to do something different from our traditional Indy Mother's Day trip. . .pretty sure she'd like to take that back now, dontcha think?

Now the weirdest and scariest part of the day today is that the docs are talking about releasing Sherri tomorrow or what sounds like Tuesday at the latest.

Now before you get indignant about this (Alison L., I'm looking at you), remember that the surgeon originally told us she'd be in hospital for 5-8 days. . .and this would put us on schedule; Also, this place appears to be full of sick people, so we don't really want to increase Sherri's risk of infection; Also some more, she wants the hell out of here; And also a little bit more, they keep giving us an evil day nurse who appears to have a chemically based disdain for Sherri that she's not even attempting to conceal or contain.

Don't worry, there's little chance that I'll fly out of here the same day as she's released. In fact, I won't fly with her before I feel completely comfortable that we are managing her pain and that I can see to her needs, so don't worry about that. We'll stay in the hotel a day or four if we have to. I'm also going to wait until we can get a direct flight out of Minneapolis because the idea of transferring planes in Chicago scares me, and just thinking about trying to do it in Detroit causes me to weep openly, which apparently disturbs Emma. . .

I'll update as soon as I get the haps.

GW